Life as he sees it
by whisperkey
Summary: DISCONTINUED:Taking parts of this story idea and adapting to When It Rains It Pours. Jayne Cobb has a unique perspective on the Firefly class ship, Serenity. His experience is his own.
1. Chapter 1

First Firefly Fic.

Jayne knew he'd made the right decision as he hauled his two duffles towards his new bunk on Serenity. Ain't no way he hadn't. 10% off the top? That was definitely a better deal than what he'd been gettin' off that gorram ugly merc. And a bunk o' his own. Shiny. He tossed his duffles, one after the other, down into his new space, listening to the thunks before turnin' back towards the hold and stomping off in that direction. There, he held his crate of shiny girls. They were his most important possessions, Vera, Tilda, Martha and Leopolda. Vera was the most valued.

He lugged the case back to his new quarters, grumbling under his breath about the distinct lack of women on board this ship-and he did like his women. Not that the number of women available to him had been all that high before. In fact, with Zoe, there was a fair 100% increase. Now, she was a fantastic specimen of woman. She was also cold. And seemed like a gorram bitch anyways. They'd get along well, but not 'like that' so to say. He punched the opening into his own bunk with his elbow, stifling a wince at the pain. Taking a swift glance around, he noticed the bright Christmas lights surrounding one of the doors. Rolling his eyes, he wondered how on earth Zoe would ever choose Christmas lights. In fact, she was the last person on earth he would have expected to have Christmas lights.

"I can't believe that gorram captain puts up with Christmas lights" he growled as he tromped down the rungs to his new quarters, balancing his crate of weapons. "Must be a nuwang hiding behind a gorram ice bitch." he said, quietly. He shook his head, one of his little voices questioning his very quick decision to join this crew. Surveying his bunk, he sighed and decided the wall above the bed would be the best place to store his Vera, his Tilda, his Martha and his Leopolda. It was a smooth wall, though and he needed some hooks to hold them by.

He drew himself out of his quarters and stomped towards the galley. Zoe was sitting there, cleaning her guns. "You know where I ken get me some hooks, hang m'guns?" he asked, crossing his arms, bulging in muscles, if he did say so himself, across his rather broad chest.

"There're extra hooks down that hall, towards the mechanic's room-who isn't in at the moment, but I'm sure the closet's well organized enough so you can find hooks." She didn't even look up from her cleaning, only a slight pause to say that. Jayne silently considered what to say when Zoe continued with "our food is yours, feel free to take some." Zoe glanced up, nodding to him as she stood up, gathering her guns.

"Good luck!" she said, before jogging out and heading to the bridge.

"Heh," was all Jayne said. He had been watching her move and was rather entranced by it. After a moment and a slight leer, he turned and stomped down the opposite direction. The slight closet took but a moment to open and Jayne growled at it under his breath even though there was no real reason to do so. He reminded himself of the money in it for him and the personal space. Even though all of this seemed like a bad place and that he'd probably wind up the butt of all the jokes in this dump of a ship. Not that he'd ever been on anything besides a dump of a ship. Seemed like a good 'un for being such a dump though.

Taking the hooks, he lay them out on the bed, before realizing he had forgotten a way to get the hooks into the wall. "Kuai de sile niu" he bit out, stomping back out, up the ladder into the hallway, muttering under his breath the whole time.

"Whoa there," a tenor voice said. Jayne looked up, glaring at the captain.

"s'cuse me. Forgot the gorram screws for the gorram hooks for my babies." He glared at the captain and side stepped, only to find the captain sidestepping as well.

"Now, I don't know you we-"

"You don't know me at all, you don't mind me sayin'" Jayne growled, eying the captain warily.

"Well, sure, but as I was sayin' I don't know you, but I won't have you stomping around this ship in a foul mood for no gorram reason. Now tell me, is there a gorram reason?"

And those words somehow cut through the fog Jayne was in. Scowling, he realized that no, in fact there wasn't. "'spect it was extra energy." he growled, sidestepping the captain who allowed it this time.

"Try not to let it happen again" Jayne said briefly and kept going to the closet. Truth, he didn't know why he was in a foul mood, but he wasn't 'bout to let it get him kicked off this new better deal. Sucking in his breath, he grabbed the screws and screwdriver and stomped back to his bunk.

For the next few hours, he sweated and growled, banged on the walls in frustration. Eventually, however, he had the rack of guns up just how he wanted. Instead of having to be strewn across the underside of his bed, possibly getting banged up in different ways, they were safe all on a wall.

***

It was later in the afternoon and Jayne was napping.

"Ngh-hoh?" he rolled over, blinking the sleep away from his eyes. "Ughhh" he groaned, sitting up slowly. It would take his body a little bit of time to get used to the bed. Throwing on his shirt, he climbed up to the walkway and headed for the kitchen. There was a young woman with light brown hair stretching to reach something in one of the top containers. Jayne swept his eyes down and up her back, appreciating her body for what it was-tight and lithe. He lingered on her backside before walking over, standing behind her and grabbing what she was so clearly reaching for.

"Here. You wanted this?" he asked, though he was positive she was.

The woman turned around and he felt like someone had punched him in the stomach. Her eyes-they were big and round and brown. And perfect.

"Thanks," she said and she smiled, though warily. And the smile did him in. He'd never seen one like that before. Or at least, that's what his heart told him even while he argued with it, saying he'd seen plenty of smiles, plenty of _female_ smiles before.

"You're welcome," he said, nearly growling. Stepping back slightly, he watched as she slipped around him and pattered out of the kitchen.

As she disappeared, he frowned. Why in the world would they have another pretty girl on board? The captain had introduced him to the companion-Inara-already, making clear she was off-limits. Not like he'd ever go with a companion. They were too high class for him. Too needy. Maybe she was Captain Mal's 'special' friend. He ignored the slight tightening in his belly, warning him of his far too strong attraction to the girl. He wondered idly, though, if he could get a 'special friend' of his own, if he found one, that is, on some planet or another.

He banged around the kitchen, opening drawers until he found what he wanted, a protein pack. He heated it up, spicing it with a cheese flavoring. He tossed it in the heater and banged around again, looking for something to eat it on. Finally, he found a plate, just as the timer dinged, saying his food was...well, edible at least. He opened the packet, and tossed it on his plate. Carrying it over to the table, he snagged a fork and started shoveling it in his mouth. It had been a long time since he'd been able to fully eat a meal. Oh, he'd gotten enough food with the last group, but he certainly hadn't been able to eat whenever he wanted, plus at meal times. Granted, he knew they only had a certain amount set aside for beside meal times, but at least they had that.

"Pigging out already, are we?" a voice sounded from the door. Jayne stiffened, one hand reaching for his weapon that wasn't there while his eyes flew to look at who was standing there.

"Mmphgmm" He half mumbled and grumbled at the first mate of the ship, Zoe. He did his best to look as intimidating as possibly. All Zoe did was raise her eyebrows and look at him, before sauntering into the room and taking a seat across from him.

"Of course, you're always welcome to eat whenever you want, but be warned-dinner's in an hour," she said, without so much as a hint of a smile.

Jayne found himself rather confused by this woman. He'd met women soldiers before, but not many. And usually, he'd been strongly attracted to them. In that matter, at least it wasn't different. However, he found himself wondering why she never smiled. Quickly though, he shoved the thought out of his mind, snorting at his stupid thoughts.

He chucked the plate and fork into the sink, intending to get to them later. "You gotta do your dishes. Only time someone does 'em for ya is when it's a mealtime. And you have to do them when it's your turn." Zoe spoke up from the table, where she was carefully cutting apart an apple.

"Grralright!" Jayne said, growling under his breath and turning back to the sink, cleaning off his plate and rinsing it. He stomped back towards his bunk, wondering how well he'd be getting along with this crew.

***

A little over an hour later, Mal's voice came over the intercom, announcing that dinner was ready. He was still hungry so he hurriedly climbed the rungs out and hurried the few feet down the walkway to the galley. The table was set and there was a lot of food there. He heard footsteps just behind him and whirled to find Mal right there.

"What'd you go and do that for!" Jayne sputtered.

"Do what?" Mal said, eyebrows raised.

"Sneakin' up b'hind a man, it's no' good fer tha heart." Jayne growled.

"I wasn't sneakin'. Just coming back from announcing that it's dinner time," Mal said, in a rather annoyed tone of voice.

"You were sneakin'" Jayne said, frowning at the fact that he hadn't heard Mal. He turned and headed for the table, realizing that perhaps he had been so caught up in looking for that girl that he'd not paid attention to the footsteps behind him.

Sitting down, he realized that he ought to wait for the rest of the seats to fill up, as that was what mal seemed to be doing. Just then, light footsteps hurried in from the same direction Mal came in.

A somewhat short, rather skinny guy hopped in and Jayne couldn't help but stare at the guy's bright red hair clashing with his Hawaiian shirt for a few seconds before scowling slightly in annoyance.

"Heya, I'm Wash. Well, the name's actually Hoban Washburn...but then, I assume you can see why I go by Wash?" he said cheerfully, sticking out his hand.

"Jayne Cobb," Jayne growled, grabbing the guy's hand and resisting the temptation to try and break it. Wash sat down, leaving a space between him and Jayne.

Zoe, the first mate was in next, coming from another direction. "Hi sweetie!" she said, smiling for the first time Jayne had seen. He looked around, wondering who she was greeting and suddenly realized it was Wash. Shrimpy little Wash that she was greeting. Well, if that don't beat all... He wondered how on earth that had happened. Well, Zoe was certainly out of the picture...Not that she'd been in it much anyways, besides those fine looking legs.

It was only then that the prettiest girl he'd laid eyes on sauntered into the room, looking rather grimy for someone who was only here to be th'captain's pet. He raised his eyebrows at her and she only smiled prettily.

"I didn't introduce m'self earlier," she said, in a voice that was rather pretty-not too low and not too high. It also sounded rather like she came from a similar place as he did, which was rather a surprise. "I'm Kaylee" she nodded to him with a smile. _Kaylee_, he rolled the name around in his head as he continued to look at her, assess her.

Breaking the slightly long silence, he said "I'm Jayne Cobb" not bothering to say anything more.

"Shiny," Kaylee said as she dropped into the seat besides Mal. "I love my captain!" she said, kissing Mal's cheek.

Mal responded by squeezing her shoulder and continuing to eat. Yep. She was definitely the captain's plaything. He stuffed the small voice voicing disappointment into the tiniest corner of his stomach. He ate his dinner quickly and stood, intending to take a tour of the meager work out equipment he'd spotted down in the hold.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I will quiet likely not be updating this until December, as I'm doing Nanowrimo. On the other hand, it is also quite likely that I WILL update this since perhaps Nanowrimo will help me w/my time management. This story is coming so much faster than my other wip fanfic. (Which has a chapter handwritten that needs to be transcribed)

RedBessRackham: Thanks for your review! I appreciate the honesty and real criticism. In terms of attraction to Kaylee, I was trying to portray sexual attraction to her-no feelings of wanting a relationship. He'd have to see a lot more of her personality for that anyways, I believe. Crude comments are coming. I'll see if I can make it a little more true to character.

Jane0904: Thanks! I've always seen him as a redhead, but I tend not to differentiate between shades and the movies I've seen Alan Tudyk in he's been a definite redhead.

Kristafied: Thanks so much! It's just my style of writing.

It had been a few days since Serenity had left Trasdor, the planet he'd been picked up on and Jayne found himself at breakfast, wondering why on earth he hadn't met the ship's mechanic yet. It was clearly a ship that desperately needed one. It seemed to be running smooth, but any ship this age, well, things tended to break down. And if they broke down, well, the best they would be was stuck in space, drifting.

He'd figure it out later, he thought as he headed down to the hold, where the bench he'd seen yesterday was. When he got down there, the hold was empty, filled only with their latest transport, the one Jayne himself had tried to hoist off them. Heading over to the weights, he organized them, arranging so that the correct weight was sitting in the correct spot.

He'd been at it for half an hour before he heard clattering footsteps on the stairs down into the hold. Hoisting the bar back to where it was supposed to be, he looked up, scowling at the Captain. Mal.

"Hey, gotta minute? Need to go over what's happening tomorrow." Mal gestured for him to sit up, and came to a halt standing in front of him. Jayne sat, slowly, watching the captain carefully. He figured the captain was rather obnoxious. At least, so far as he could tell. The man seemed a little too full of himself and his orders.

"Yeah, got nothin' but minutes here." Jayne said, looking the man in the eye. Mal shifted, seemingly slightly uncomfortable with that, but Jayne figured ain't no harm in lookin' a man in the eye. If'n the captain had a problem wi' that, well, this weren't the ship for Jayne.

"Right. Well, we're droppin' this off over at Badger's and see if he's got some job for us. I'll want you there. Bring a gun or two, but they'll probably be taken away while we're there. See if you can get in something beyond his security." Mal rubbed the back of his neck, still slightly unsure of what to make of his new merc.

"Alright." Jayne growled. Just then, someone loudly clomped their way down the stairs, making a racket far beyond that which the captain had. Leaning to the side, he whistled as Kaylee made her way down the stairs wearing a cute shirt and...were those coveralls hanging at her waist? And combat boots. What an odd combination. Just then, he felt a hand impact his shoulder.

"What!" he asked. "Can't whistle at a girl?" Said girl was now laughing openly at him. " 'specially a girl only here for your pleasure?" He asked, knowing he was perhaps crossing a line.

"What-Kaylee? Kaylee's not here for me. Well, I mean, she is, since it's my ship. What were you thinking!" Mal said, looking rather outraged. "Kaylee's our genius mechanic, it's why she's here. And I won't have you objectifyin' any of my crew." Mal glared at Jayne.

"I-she's what? She's our mechanic?" Jayne said, eyes widening. "Don't look like no mechanic to me!" At this point, Kaylee had made her way over to them.

"What d'you mean, I don't look like no mechanic?" she asked, looking Jayne over. "Mechanic can look any way. I'm the best, Cap'n says so!" She punched Jayne's shoulder.

"Owww, what'd you do that for?" he asked, rubbing his twice hit shoulder.

"You deserved that, thinkin' I was here sexin' the Cap'n," Kaylee said, tossing her hair. "Me n' the cap'n, we're siblings-like, y'see?"

"I-you couldn't possibly-Kaylee and I, no!" Mal said, gesturing uselessly between the two. "And don't you dare-" he pointed at Jayne.

"Alright, alright!" he said, holding his hands. "I can see when I'm bein' ganged up on. I'm goin, I'm goin!" He side stepped around the two, leerin at Kaylee before jogging off towards the front of the ship.

"Watch out for that one, Kaylee Frye," Mal said, feeling like he'd been run roughshod over.

"Won't be no trouble," Kaylee said. "Say, Cap'n," smiling up at him, "We'll need some parts when we reach Persephone."

"Ohhh, Kaylee, shoulda known you were only comin' down here to get me to buy something," Mal grumbled. "What's broke this time?" He asked.

"The sparkers, They're fried. Gonna last a few days, 'til we get there. Be really lucky if they last us past then." Kaylee smiled winningly up at him.

"Alright alright. Just take some money from the lockbox, Kaylee. You're killin' me!" Mal looked at her pathetically.

Kaylee only laughed. Standing on her tiptoes, she kissed his cheek. "I love my cap'n!" She said, before hurrying off, footsteps echoing heavily. Mal sighed and looked around the hold, wondering how on the world he'd gotten himself such an...interesting crew.

"Right then," he muttered, turning to head up the stairs himself, intent on finding Zoe.

It was indeed, twenty four hours later when Wash landed Serenity at the loading docks for Persephone. Smoothest landing Jayne had experienced in a ship like this, older and small. Not that he'd been on too many of them. Most of his jobs had ended up on one planet or another, not based on a ship. He climbed out of his bunk and headed towards the hold again. He had his two worst guns strapped on in obvious spots, plus a knife in a rather uncomfortable spot. He managed to walk alright, though and that was what mattered, hiding that last weapon.

"You ready, Jayne?" Mal's voice sounded from the lower part of the hold, where Mal was checking his own weapon and Zoe was moving the crates to the center and loading them on the mule.

"Yeah," he growled, stomping down the stairs. Kaylee was standing off to the side, checking a list on a piece of paper. "Where's the whore?" he asked, looking around for Inara.

"Companion." Zoe said, checking her gun. "She's not a whore, she's a companion."

"Right. I'm not a mercenary. She's doesn't have sex with people for money" Jayne said a low laugh barking out his throat. "Trouble is, she's a picky whore."

And then, his head snapped back, on account of the fist on his nose. "Don't ever call Inara a whore. She's a companion," Mal snarled, shaking his hand.

"Okay! Okay! She's a companion, jeez. You didn't hafta punch so hard" Jayne said, a bit of a whine in his voice and his eyes practically tearing from the hit.

"Just remember what Zoe said. She's not a companion and we'll all get along, y'understand?" Mal said, looking darkly at his new merc, wondering if it would be worth it to have Jayne on board. Talent or no.

"Shiny" Jayne said, turning and tromping towards the out of doors. He'd never been to Persephone before and found himself overwhelmed by the hectic chaos he was greeted with. There were fastly moving vehicles, people moving all over the place and shops and buildings sprung up as if there had been no plan at all and they just decided to spring into existence every which way.

"Oy, we're goin' this way, Jayne!" Mal yelled this, half turned. Zoe and Kaylee were on the mule, and were going to drive it around to pick up what they needed before dropping off the goods at Badgers. Wash was on resupply duty, meaning he got to stay around Serenity and make sure all the waste was unloaded as well as new food, water, oxygen and fuel cells among other things were all loaded correctly. Jayne did not look forward to the day he'd be assigned that. Though, truth be telling, it was far more logical for Wash to receive that pleasant duty as pilot than it was for him, as hired gun. So perhaps he'd avoid it for a good long while. Perhaps.

He walked as if he hadn't a care in the world, which was exactly how Mal wanted him to act, at least in this particular case. And even though he presented this to the world, it wasn't what was happening. In fact, his sharp blue eyes were catching on to the littlest events. The hurried conversation between two stall owners who were obviously having an affair, the little boy itching to steal a loaf of bread, the assassin without a job. Only when he started picking out notable landmarks Mal had mentioned to him did he start realy looking-for those who were on the lookout for them. There was only one, and he faded into the darkness of an alley only milliseconds after Jayne saw him. Badger would know they were coming, but only just, exactly as Mal was hoping. Of course, this wasn't some sort of fight, but Mal wanted to keep Badger on his toes, show off his new thug, make sure the balance of power was equal so that they were both getting their equal.

"Cap'n, only one so's far as I can see," Jayne said gruffly as he noticed they were approaching a particular building.

"Alright, you two, you know what'll happen," Mal said, sounding resigned. Jayne nodded, looking grimly at the door. He didn't like having his guns taken away. Even if they were gonna give 'em back.

"Don' like the look o' this place, Mal," Jayne said, looking around uneasily.

"I know, that's why we have you, Jayne," Mal said, sounding rather tetchy himself.

"Can I say I told you so if somethin' goes down?" Jayne asked. Silence was his answer. "I'll take that as a yes" he grinned quickly before assuming a more serious look as they finally reached their destination.

"We're here to see Badger," Mal said, hooking his thumbs through his belt loops and looking..captain-y. Jayne stood back and growled menacingly while Zoe looked like, well, she looked like she always did except when Wash was around. Resolute. They were allowed to enter, flanked by two of Badger's lackeys. One was a rather stout, short man, dark skin and dark curly hair. The other was a taller, muscled man whose face was rather scarred and he had a shaven head. Jayne sneered. Once they were nearing a door, the two paused and held their hands out. Mal rolled his eyes, already knowing the procedure. He took out his revolver and his little pistol, handing them over to the rather taller one, Mikhail. Jayne growled, taking out his pistol, from his chest holder and his revolver from his thigh holder. Zoe handed over her guns and they passed through, Jayne maintaining his rather tough man appearance, scowling around. They were greeted by a slight shorter man with two days stubble and a bowler hat. This was Badger? Well, at least the escorts looked successfully intimidating. Of course, Jayne knew from experience that even those who didn't look intimidating could be...well, terrifying to the normal person. Rather an annoyance to him for the most part.

"Alrighty, I see y've got me me goods," Badger said, speaking in a strong cockney accent.

"Yep," Mal said. "Wanted t'see if'n you'd got more work for us."

"Might, at that," Badger said, gesturing for them to sit. They all awkwardly took seats around a table while Badger remained standing. A few other people were in the large room, off to the sides, talking and standing looking intimidating.

"Now, what is this job, you might have for us?" Mal said, cutting right to the chase.

"We'll get to that in a moment," Badger said, fiddling with a small dagger in his hands. "Firstlywise, I want ta be hearin' 'bout how this journey o' yours went. Heard you ran inta some trouble. How was that?" he asked, glancing flintily over at Jayne. Jayne just stared mulishly back.

"Well, me an' Zoe were outmatched in our hiding to being found skills by Jayne here. Seems to have a nose for...finding things. Convinced him to help us find things," Mal said, rather casually.

"So you offered him more money," Badger said. "I see. And you think he'll stick?"

Jayne felt it was perhaps, appropriate for him to jump in at this point, saying "I'll stick unless there's a reason I shouldn't be stickin'. Like 12% or somethin'" He crossed his arms and leaned back in the chair, ignoring the uncomfortable way his knife poked at him."

Badger nodded before briskly sitting in the empty chair. "I have a client what needs a transport out to Serene. Best be fast and best be discreet. Think you migh' be able to handle that, _Captain_?" He asked, smiling at Mal.

"Think I could. Zoe?" Mal asked.

"So long as Badger here continues to tell us the truth, We'll all be fine, sir" Zoe said, looking serious. Well, she looked like she usually did, which was serious. Neither of them glanced at Jayne.

"We'll do the job, Badger. You'll get us the details?" he asked, rising.

"Course I will," Badger said, ushering them out of the room. They walked back to the entrance with the same escorts, were silently handed their guns and ushered out of the room.


	3. Chapter 3

Jayne stumped down to the cargo hold where Kaylee was merrily chatting to no one in particular while she lay under the mule, little chinks and tinkles coming from her general direction.

"You talkin' ta ghosties there, Kaylee," Jayne asked, kicking at the side of mule, which made a clanging noise.

She slid out from under it, practically beaming at him. Jayne sneered. "No, silly, talkin' ta myself an' tha mule. Needs ta hear it'll be ok, after all," she said cheerily.

Jayne could not believe how wide Kaylee's smile was. She was fixing something that was old and falling apart and would probably have the Captain on her ass-well, that tweren't a lovely a picture-if she didn't fix it and soon.

"Well, keep it down, and we'll be shiny," Jayne said with a growl before turning and stomping away. Kaylee had been nothing but shiny and cheerful and sunny and everythin' he wasn't ever since he'd boarded. Didn't stop the butterflies in his gut every time her brown eyes looked at him. He still dreamed about her. Her brown eyes looking up at him as she went down on him, him as he crawled over her body, taking her in the engine room, the kitchen, Inara's space shuttle, a rundown junkyard. Everywhere.

He glanced back at Kaylee who was back under the mule, her left leg bent up at the knee, jiggling along to her humming. He turned away quickly and growled to himself. He checked his guns and proceeded to move the crates from the sides to the center where they could be easily loaded onto the mule.

He was focused on his work and started slightly as he turned to find Mal jogging down the steps. Grumbling slightly to himself, he set the boxes down and turned to retrieve the last crate. As he did so, he heard Mal yell.

"Kaylee, ya got that mule fixed up?" he was standing over Kaylee's legs.

Kaylee slid out with a huge grin on her face. "Just 'bout cap'n" She said.

Jayne rolled his eyes. "Don't see how she can be so cheerful 'bout fixin' a mule, there, Mal," he growled.

"Now, see here's my theory," Mal said, turning to Jayne, gesturing aimlessly with one hand. "It's that Kaylee was born cheerful an' there ain't nothin' we can do 'bout it. If we were blind and deaf we'd probably still be subject to her cheeriness."

"Huh," Jayne said, throwing his head back a little. It was indeed, the first time the two of them had actually agreed on something. "Do believe you and I can 'gree on that there," he said, leaning back on his heels.

"Well, now, ain't that the day where hell ices over," Mal said sarcastically. Jayne shrugged. Mal turned only to find Kaylee standing there.

"I do love my captain," she said with a cheery smile and leaned up to kiss him on the cheek.

"See what I mean?" Mal said with a sardonic raise of an eyebrow. Jayne snorted.

"I'ma gonna go get ma guns," Jayne said shortly, stomping out of the cargo bay.

The job had gone over without a hitch and the crew was sitting in a back booth in some nameless podunk bar. To Jayne's knowledge, Mal had no plans for violence, but something about his eyes, well Jayne ignored it, but Zoe had seemed to see it as well. She had duly turned to Wash and asked brightly if he and Kaylee ought not to be checking the ship over making sure it was ready to go. There had been some protesting from Kaylee, but Jayne had spoken up as well.

"I don't feel like twistin' bout in space, girly an' I'd feel safter if'n you'ld check the boat over once more," Jayne growled. Kaylee started, looking over Jayne, giving him a grimace and then stood, following Wash, who had clearly gotten the message that violence was to ensue and he knew perfectly well he wanted no part in it. As they walked away, he could hear Kaylee whining about having to leave a bar filled with so many swai men around as they walked away. Sometimes, he found it a little on the odd side, that it was Wash and Zoe who were married. Sometimes it seemed as if Wash and Kaylee would so much better suit. Or him and Kaylee, but that was his pecker talking, not the little bit o' sense he had left in his brain pan. Besides the fact that Mal had warned him off her in no uncertain terms. And while he wasn't sure Mal would carry through, he wasn't about to test the threat for a little tussle in the sack.

Not to mention that Kaylee had shown no interest in him, which stung a bit. He lifted his mug, taking a swig of the ale he had gotten. He watched as Captain Mal swaggered towards the bar, leaving Zoe and Jayne alone. Jayne glanced at Zoe briefly. "So, is it you or me?" he asked.

"Your turn, I got it last. Be right behind you," Zoe said, still watching Mal.

"Right, then," Jayne growled standing and following Mal to the bar. He paid as little visible attention to Mal as possible and snagged one of the pool cues, tossing it idly from hand to hand as he stood near Mal. Zoe would be the one on the outside, watching their backs while Mal and Jayne fought in the center. It was something Zoe had mentioned to him on his second or third day on the ship. Mal had a tendency to either throw the first punch or goad someone into doing it for him whenever they were in a bar. Jayne was expected to help Zoe in keeping Mal from being killed. Jayne had no trouble with this as he personally liked getting in fights.

Sure enough, Jayne watched as some of the laborers around him perked up, trying to close in on Mal, who was talking to a niu pi gu. Apparently said niu pi gu was popular among these rim-folk. And just as the man tried to throw a punch, Jayne hit him in the back of the head with the butt end of the pool cue, turning fluidly and jabbing the front into the overhanging gut of the man behind him. The fat man's face turned red and Jayne moved on, avoiding the spew of bile coming up. He rammed into someone who was trying to get to mal, shoving them back into the pool table with the cue and swinging the cue like a bat towards the man who was trying to hit him. Mal seemed to be holding up pretty well, but Jayne snorted anyways. Somehow people always seemed to think Mal was the better fighter. Maybe they were assuaging the captain's ego, Jayne figured as he tripped someone, following them down with a bash to their head with the larger end of the pool cue.

Zoe was near him now, taking care of the men around her with a fluid ease. He grinned and maneuvered himself closer to the captain. Sometimes, it was better to fight together than apart and Mal certainly looked a tad worse for the wear while Jayne hadn't gotten hit yet.

He blocked one fist towards him, only to have to correct his earlier smug thought as he felt a fist in his gut. He swung out with the pool cue and got the offender in the side of the head. He punched another man and shoved one against the bar as the man went for Mal's throat.

"Think it might be time to be leavin' this joint," Jayne shouted to Mal who absentmindedly nodded as he held someone in a headlock. Jayne grabbed the man rushing him and pushed him on his way, knocking him into the man behind him conveniently. Heh. It was just starting to get fun. He noticed Zoe trip up and grabbed a bar stool, utilizing it to squeeze through the hordes of people who now, were not only fighting them, but each other. Jayne grinned ferally. Perfect way to get out of the fight without being beaten to death.   "Let's make a dash," Jayne yelled into Zoe's ear as he made to her side, knocking aside one youngster who looked like he had had enough with a black eye forming and blood being spat out of his mouth. His gut was going to hurt, and the side of his head where some idiot had managed to accidentally clobber him. And his knuckles, of course. He reached out and kicked a guy that was going for Zoe from the side. The man promptly fell on the ground and Jayne kicked him a few times to make sure he stayed down. He picked up another bar stool and pushed his way to the door, Zoe and Mal close enough behind. Eventually, they reached the outside, with only a few more punches thrown. Jayne frowned, glancing behind them before glancing ahead. Thank god this wasn't like the last time when the police had shown up. The three of them jogged back towards Serenity.

"Ya really can't go dirtside without a fight can ya," Jayne asked Mal. "Not that I mind, see," Jayne growled with a laugh.

Mal arched a brow sardonically. "I didn't start it."

"Sure ya didn't, but ya do know how ta finish 'em" Jayne said, playing with the one gun he had brought and had avoided using. It was little annie, the first gun he had ever gotten and it was not his most useful, but it was his first and that meant something. It was also easy to hide. Now, he twirled it around his fingers before tucking it back in where he had stored it on the holster on his leg. As they strolled back onto Serenity, Kaylee came running down. "Cap'n!" She cried. "Zoe, are you alright?"

Jayne sneered, noting that she hadn't said anything to him. "Jayne, are you ok?" She asked, fluttering over him as well. He snorted. "Jus' some bruisin' you don' have ta worry." Jayne sneered, stomping towards his quarters.

He vaguely heard Kaylee ask what on earth she could have done and only heard Zoe's voice. Nothing he could make out though. As he neared his quarters, however, he saw Wash coming down towards him.

"Can I help you, little man?" Jayne asked sarcastically, since Wash seemed to be looking right at him.

Wash seemed unafraid of him. "Yes, actually. You can teach me how to shoot," he said, looking up at Jayne.

"Shoot?" Jayne asked in befuddlement.

"You know, where the things you carry go 'bang' and generally ends up with the other person dead or severely bleeding?" Wash asked.

Jayne rolled his eyes. "Yeah, why d'ya wanna learn?"

"Well, we are a violent crew. Have a feeling it'll come in handy sometime. Maybe when the rest of you are out and it's only Kaylee and I here." Wash said, crossing his arms.

"Oh." Jayne nodded, thinking about the possibilities of ambush on their own ship. Could be possible. "Yeah I'll teach ya. Find me in the hold sometime," Jayne growled, pushing open his hatch and climbing down into it.


End file.
